Category: Dougs creations

You think Brian Williams has lived an exciting life? HA!

Brian Williams taking RPG fire? Saving puppies from fires? Getting the squirts from ingesting storm water during Katrina? Bitch please. When it comes to exciting living, look at my record. I mean being the only survivor at Little Big Horn, thanks to my having a handy Apache helicopter, and bedding Salma Hayek, AND Halle Berry at the same time? Yeah, top those feats Williams!

Or how about the time I beat Michael Jordan in one-on-one? Or the times Urban Meyer asked me to lay out the game plans when my Gators beat Ohio State and Oklahoma to win National Championships? Let’s see Brian Williams do that! Then there was that time I saved kids at a burning orphanage AND the Budweiser Clydesdales from  a nuclear attack by ISIS all in one damn night! What ya got now Brian Williams? POSER!

You do not have to be Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs to write for Slate

Slate is the MSNBS of online magazines, and, here is the latest outrageous outrage they have discovered. Beware Infant Gender Assignment!

Obstetricians, doctors, and midwives commit this procedure on infants every single day, in every single country. In reality, this treatment is performed almost universally without even asking for the parents’ consent, making this practice all the more insidious. It’s called infant gender assignment: When the doctor holds your child up to the harsh light of the delivery room, looks between its legs, and declares his opinion: It’s a boy or a girl, based on nothing more than a cursory assessment of your offspring’s genitals.

Declares his opinion? And you say this “opinion” is based on something as flimsy as genitals? SHOCKING! I mean, yes, in fact gender IS defined by genitals, just as writing for Slate is defined on absurdity. I am trying to conger up how the “evil” gender assignment goes. The doctor, holds up a child, peers at the genitals, and calmly calls the nurse over.

“Excuse me nurse, but this baby appears to have a penis, do you concur?”

“Why yes doctor, that looks like a penis to me”

“So, this baby then, must be a boy”

“Why yes doctor, yes”

See, this is OUTRAGEOUS! And thankfully, we have an outraged American to expose this shockingly shocking outrageously outrageous outrage! I know I am outraged! and we all should be. I mean think about where this might lead! The Slate piece continues

We tell our children, “You can be anything you want to be.” We say, “A girl can be a doctor, a boy can be a nurse,” but why in the first place must this person be a boy and that person be a girl? Your infant is an infant. Your baby knows nothing of dresses and ties, of makeup and aftershave, of the contemporary social implications of pink and blue. As a newborn, your child’s potential is limitless. The world is full of possibilities that every person deserves to be able to explore freely, receiving equal respect and human dignity while maximizing happiness through individual expression.

Wait, what? How dare this Slate writer call that infant an infant? Who the Hell are they to place that kind of label on that baby? I mean, yes, the fact IS that it is an infant, but facts do not matter. I mean, if a penis or vagina do not have anything to do with gender, then how does a baby actually being a baby mean anything either? But, this is important stuff, it MUST BE because only really important topics are covered in Slate right? Either that or this writer is as crazy as they come

With infant gender assignment, in a single moment your baby’s life is instantly and brutally reduced from such infinite potentials down to one concrete set of expectations and stereotypes, and any behavioral deviation from that will be severely punished—both intentionally through bigotry, and unintentionally through ignorance. That doctor (and the power structure behind him) plays a pivotal role in imposing those limits on helpless infants, without their consent, and without your informed consent as a parent. This issue deserves serious consideration by every parent, because no matter what gender identity your child ultimately adopts, infant gender assignment has effects that will last through their whole life.

See! Your child’s life will be RUINED, R-U-I-N-E-D RUINED if a doctor is allowed to say it is a boy, or it is a girl! Oh there are several layers of KRAZY here folks I mean this MUST be a hoax right? No one could possibly believe the absurdities uttered here right? I mean even Slate must no allow this level of KRAZY right? Wrong!

Why must we force this on kids at birth? What is achieved, besides reinforcing tradition? What could be the harm in letting a child wait to declare for themself who they are, once they’re old enough (which is generally believed to happen around age 2 or 3)?

What insanity is this? When was the last time you, as a parent, grandparent, or uncle as I a witnessed a 2 or 3-year-old “declare themselves”? I doubt anyone has, but what would it sound like? Let us think here.

Think of a family gathering. As the adults are drinking their coffees, here comes young Patrick, age 3. “Excuse me everyone” Patrick says, clinking a fork on a water glass. “I am glad I have you all hear, I have something I need to say. I am, in fact, a girl, or rather a woman, trapped in a little boy’s body. Yes, yes, I do have a penis, but do not label me because of that you genderist bastards! I am woman, hear me roar! So, I have a list of demands here, call them my Gender Justice List if you will.” I have more here, but you will have to wait for the book to be published. it is called “My fight for Gender Justice: How My Inner Vagina and I beat Genderism!”

Of course, that is a bit of absurdity to illustrate how wrong, foolish, inane, insane, BATSHIT CRAZY this writer really is. Yes, Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!


Liberalism is an Ideology of Pessimism. Undeniable Truth #2 about Liberalism

Years ago, when I wrote weekly columns for various newspapers and websites I wrote a piece about how the Right was optimistic, and the Left pessimistic. That idea struck me over time. I watched, read and listened to Liberals and no matter what the topic was, they always seemed angry, embittered, and oddest of all they seemed strangely happy to be angry and bitter. It seemed that being a victim was the goal of every Liberal. And not just being a victim mind you, but being the biggest victim, or at least a member of a victim group. What a strange thing to aspire to, what a sad thing to aspire to. And the “victims” were not just poor people, no, actors, professors, politicians, very successful people who were Liberal seemed stuck on this victim mantra too. I began to visualize a line of Liberals singing new words to that old Dr. Pepper jingle. “I’m a victim she’s a victim, he’s a victim, wouldn’t you like to be a victim too”

Nothing today better illustrates the glorification of victimhood than the latest Leftist creation, White Privilege. Here is a video put together by Progressives Today that shows the White Privilege con game in action. Liberals trying to make more victims, and instill greater levels of pessimism in our youth

Lest you think that victim pimping is the only form of pessimism among Liberals consider this. It is almost exclusively Liberals that really believe in Climate Change, or Climate Disruption, as they are now styling it. They truly believe we are doomed unless we radically change, and by change I mean lower our standard of living. There is real panic among the  true believers. So, what if you had a fried like this, a friend who was just certain we must act now, or it would be too late? What if you found some research that painted a less drastic picture? What if you shared this with your stressed out friend? Likely that friend would attack you as a climate denier, or some flat earther. Rather than at least looking at your information, they would become angry that you dared challenge the teachings of what I call the Al Gore Cult of Climate Change. You would naturally be confused by this. Until you understood that Liberalism is an ideology for the pessimistic. Do not interrupt their bad attitude or their pity parties man. They do not want any good news, pessimism rules with them.

It is not just climate change either. Take issues of race for example. What is the constant mantra of Liberals? Racism is still rampant in America. We really have not come that far. Republicans want to take us back to Jim Crow. Racism is inherent to America, and so on. And again, you dare not try to paint a brighter picture to Liberals. If you do you will be called racist, or at the very least out of touch with the history. You will be told you just do not understand that slavery still haunts Black Americans. And do NOT, I repeat do not mention that slavery has been gone for 150 years either. If you do you will be accused of defending slavery. Again, do not interrupt the pity party!

Feminism, another wing of Leftism is likely the most bitter and pessimistic of all. Men are all pigs, all sex is rape, men are pigs, all sex dehumanizes women, men are still pigs, women are victims of the Patriarchy, and yes, PIGS! What a lousy attitude to carry around with you in life. Everything is negative with Liberals. As a test listen to Liberals, listen to their rhetoric, and see how much pessimism in contained in it. And we wonder why so many liberals are so angry?