These are diseases I have diagnosed that seem to strike those on the political and ideological left.
Selective Memory Syndrome-SMS
This disease causes Liberals to conveniently forget certain facts that prove inconvenient for them. An example might be Hillary’s Tuzla accounts.
Truth Deficit Disorder-TDD
Remember Al Gore’s lies in the 2000 debates? His grandiose claims? Well Gore seems to suffer from TDD, he just cannot recognize the truth.
This was the first Liberal disease I diagnosed. The most common symptom is being offended over everything. Je$$e Jackson suffers from this, as everything offends him. Many other “civil rights” activists are suffering from this as well. Look ast them, they are always PO’d! And it almost seems they are only happy when offended. Very sad disease.
Perpetual Offended Syndrome-POS
Much like Offendeditis, except sufferers are ALWAYS upset and scowling, angry at everything. Many “civil rights” activists suffer from this.
Selective Outrage Syndrome-SOS
Ever take note of how “sensitive” Liberals are quick to become outraged over a certain things, like any criticism of a fellow Liberal? They rant about how insensitive and divisive it is. Yet, when a Conservative is attacked in the same way…. No outrage at all.
Radical Atheists and ACLU members are the most common victims of this. Anytime they see ANYTHING remotely Christian, or hear ANYTHING remotely Christian, they break out in hives and start speed dialing the ACLU, and other radical Atheists! From there, their condition declines, they are afflicted with accute Offendeditis, and SOS. Foaming at the mouth may soon follow, and finally, they will start having paranoid thoughts, and delusuions of victimhood. Very sad!
Racial Obsession Syndrome, or ROS is the latest disease I have diagnosed. Like the others, it is a very sad disease to see. Those who suffer its wrath are so focused on skin color, that they refuse to recognize any other factors in human behavior. To these victims, EVERYTHING is racial. The current election season has certainly exposed many who are suffering the ravages of ROS. The latest example comes to us from Andrew Greeley, who cannot fathom ANY reason anyone would not vote for Obama, except for, well you know.. just read his words and observe ROS in action!
This malady causes Liberals to care nothing about principles, or staying consistent in their ideals. What they say is right today, might not be right next month, or when a when a person of a different party expresses a certain viewpoint. It causes Liberals to put emotion over principled ideals
Eternal Bitterness Syndrome
Symptoms will include perpetual anger, and resentment, making nasty faces, and always looking like you are constipated and angry about it. Feminists are especially susceptible to the disease, as being bitter is a big part of being a Feminist. For a classic case study see Janeane Garofalo